Confrontation dilemma

One of the trickiest things a person has to do sometimes is confront another individual. In the workplace we are often faced with conflict arising from issues related to actions taken by an individual that directly impact us in some way. How do we effectively communicate concerns to another person in a way that does not alienate that person, but still allows us to confront the issue?

Often, I’m baffled by the choice to flee or fight when I’m faced with a conflict arising from the actions from another individual. Especially when I know that the other person is clearly wrong, my inner being just feel like fighting back, to stand up for what I know is right.

On the other hand, I worry that if I do voice out, I would be doing it for the wrong reason- to shame, rather than correct the opposite party. Even if I am clear of my (good) motives, I fear of taking the risks of rejection and anger. I fear that I’ll be seen as the ‘offender’ of another’s feelings. Hence, I flee from the issue altogether. I keep silent.

However, perhaps I have been wrong in thinking that I have only two choices in managing conflicts; either to flight or fight. Perhaps there is another option, the best and rightful one too- godly confrontation. For when I consider to ‘flight’ (flee) or ‘fight’ a situation, what eventually happens is I end up feeling frustrated with myself for either not standing up for the truth when I have the chance, or for being unforgiving and self-seeking in fighting for the respect I think I deserve.

But if I consider godly confrontation, I wouldn’t have to fear standing up for the truth. Neither would I be combative or argumentative in proving my rights. Instead, I would be trusting God to help me resolve the situation. My relationship with the Father is what I would first address. His throne of grace would be where I would first approach. His agenda would be what I would seek first; not my problems or solutions.

I believe that through godly confrontation, what will eventually happen is I would have His wisdom and courage to do what is right and necessary.